FearLESS Parenting Interview of Shellee Howard

My guest this week is College Ready’s CEO, Shellee Howard. Shelle is a sought after speaker and consultant to 100’s of college bound students around the world and is widely regarded as one of the world’s leading college planners and strategy consultants. Her ground breaking strategies help students get into their best match colleges. Best of all, many graduate debt free with a job they love waiting for them.

Shellee Howard’s Book: https://collegereadyplan.com/book/ CoLllege Ready Website: https://collegereadyplan.com/about-us/  

And don’t forget about our Live2Lead Event; which we are using as a fundraising event. At Live2Lead, You Can Up Level Your  Leadership While Helping Aspiring College Student By Helping Organizations Like Folds Of Honor: l2lhost.com/nwardjourney  

For More Information On Folds Of Honor: https://player.vimeo.com/video/253285064?app_id=122963

#collegefunding #leadership #collegeaccess #studentsfirst

What I Learned From The Fairytale, The Scorpion And The Frog, Regarding Ministering To Those With Self-Destructive Behaviors

The Story: One day, a scorpion looked around at the mountain where she lived and decided that she wanted to cross the river. The river was wide and swift, and the scorpion stopped to reconsider the situation. She couldn't see any way across. So she ran upriver and then checked downriver, all the while thinking that she might have to turn back.

Suddenly, she saw a frog sitting in the rushes by the bank of the stream on the other side of the river. She decided to ask the frog for help getting across the stream. "Hello Mr. Frog!" called the scorpion across the water, "Would you be so kind as to give me a ride on your back across the river?"

"Well now, Madame. Scorpion! How do I know that if I try to help you, you won’t try to kill me?" asked the frog hesitantly. "Because," the scorpion replied, "If I try to kill you, then I would die too, for you see I cannot swim!"

Now this seemed to make sense to the frog. But he asked. "What about when I get close to the bank? You could still try to kill me and get back to the shore!" "This is true," agreed the scorpion, "But then I wouldn't be able to get to the other side of the river!"

"Alright then...how do I know you won’t just wait till we get to the other side and THEN kill me?" said the frog. "Ahh...," crooned the scorpion, "Because you see, once you've taken me to the other side of this river, I will be so grateful for your help, that it would hardly be fair to reward you with death, now would it?!"

So the frog agreed to take the scorpion across the river. He swam over to the bank and settled himself near the mud to pick up his passenger. The scorpion crawled onto the frog's back, her sharp claws prickling into the frog's soft hide, and the frog slid into the river. The muddy water swirled around them, but the frog stayed near the surface so the scorpion would not drown. He kicked strongly through the first half of the stream, his flippers paddling wildly against the current.

Halfway across the river, the frog suddenly felt a sharp sting in his back and, out of the corner of his eye, saw the scorpion remove her stinger from his back. A deadening numbness began to creep into his limbs. "You fool!" croaked the frog, "Now we shall both die! Why on earth did you do that?"

The scorpion shrugged, and did a little jig on the drowning frog's back. "I could not help myself. Self destruction - It’s my Nature", said the Scorpion. Then they both sank into the muddy waters of the swiftly flowing river.

Many have asked the following question:

How do I handle people who have destructive behaviors like the scorpion and what’s more – how can I enter into a trusting relationship to minister to them?

First you need to understand a few terms – first behavior and second, destructive behavior. Behavior is the way in which somebody responds or acts. Behavior is generally habitual – something that has become common place for the individual. Destructive behavior can be defined as a response or action by an individual that are intended to damage or hurt rather than be helpful or instructive.

Now what does destructive behavior look like. Destructive behavior comes in many shapes and forms. Examples of are: drug/alcohol abuse, spousal abuse, gossiping, bullying, pornography, etc. These behaviors are destructive because they are addictive behaviors which take on a negative life of their own. These addictions consistently call out to these individuals to act out in a self-destructive manner.

The purpose of the Church, like Christ, is to minister to the lost, sick and yes, the self-destructive individuals of the world. When Jesus walked upon the earth, he ministered directly to the bitter, lost and hurting.

In Luke 5:29-31 it says that: ²⁹ Levi made a great feast for him in his house. There was a great crowd of tax collectors and others who were reclining with them. ³⁰ Their scribes and the Pharisees murmured against his disciples, saying, "Why do you eat and drink with the tax collectors and sinners?" ³¹ Jesus answered them, "Those who are healthy have no need for a physician, but those who are sick do. ³² I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance."

Jesus wanted the hurting to recognize the wrong in their lives, be sorry for it, and turn to him (and only him) to remove every wrong forever, as their personal savior, from their lives. Jesus knew that repentance was the first step towards a personal walk with Christ and personal healing.

Likewise, we also must come to call not on those who are well, but upon these very people with self-destructive behaviors. Now this does not mean that you are to give the scorpion a ride on your back to get him or her across their rivers (challenges or problems) in life. The scorpion had never taken the first step to making effective change in her life - admitting the destructive behavior, being sorry for her destructive behavior and the need to change her destructive behavior.

It is important to note that without this first step, self-destructive individuals “will” continue their destructive behavior. This first step or repentance is a must. You must realize this in order to effectively minister to someone with self-destructive behavior

Instead you have to be smart and use the talents God has given you to help those with self-destructive behavior cross their respective rivers in life. The frog would have been much better off attaching a rope to a stick or branch and towing the scorpion across the river. This would have presented a win – win situation for the frog and scorpion. This way frog could have effectively ministered to the personal needs of the scorpion in crossing her river.

Likewise, you need to enter into a ministry relationship where you will not fall prey to the destructive behavior of those you are ministering to. When they are willing to recognize the wrong in their lives, be sorry for it, and turn to Jesus to remove every wrong from their lives, as their personal savior. After that first step is taken, be supportive as the individual makes continual progress towards positive change in their life. Help them define what positive change looks like and establish the necessary goals that will bring about continued Christian growth.

Stan Lewis is a Christian Leadership & Life Coach. If you liked this article, you should really explore coaching to increase your personal growth & development by Clicking Here or the various line of Myers-Briggs©, FIRO-B©, STRONG©, & CPI© assessments at www.realcoach.org. He also has awesome freebies on his site. Questions about this article or you need assistance, please call me at 214-629-7217.

PROMISE KEEPERS ADVANCE WEEKENDS

Rallies and Men’s Ministry Training help men, churches prepare for “Unleashed”

So exactly how do guys get ready for the incredible “Unleashed” men’s conference? About eight weeks before the semi-trucks roll into town, hundreds of men are gathering, planning, praying, and strategizing for the upcoming Promise Keepers arena events. That kick-off event is called “Power Up!” Rallies are being planned for 11 of the conference cities (see schedule). In nine of those cities, there will be additional training called “Power Up! Leadership Training.”

“The Power Up! rally is just a taste of what guys will experience at the main event,” said Steve Hutton, vice president of field ministry for Promise Keepers, speaking about the rallies. “The men who know about Promise Keepers and respond early can come to 'Power Up' to pick up some strategies and encouragement to bring other guys to the Unleashed conference.”

Strategic leaders of Promise Keepers, including president/CEO Dr. Tom Fortson, co-founder Dr. Dave Wardell, or Chairman Emeritus Bishop Phillip Porter will be at the “Power Up” rallies. Keynote speaker is Phil Chapin, who blew men away at last year’s “Awakening” conferences with his personal story of overcoming his wickedly abusive childhood.

“God has redeemed my life in such a powerful way, it even amazes me,” says Chapin. “I really want to meet the men of Promise Keepers in a local church setting, where we can go a little deeper, and inspire each other to do some great things in this broken world.”

The brand new promotional videos from the DVD will be also be screened at the free Power Up! rallies.

PROMISE KEEPERS MEN’S MINISTRY TRAINING GETS RAVE REVIEWS!

Promise Keepers and Man in the Mirror are drawing rave reviews from men who attended brand new leadership training sessions, which are being held weeks ahead of the 2006 “Unleashed” men’s conference.

Here are a few quotes from men who attended the Saturday morning “Unleashed” Leadership Training sessions: “… exceeded my expectations… (our men) felt the value… overwhelmed with the information and dynamics of setting up and running an effective men’s ministry… we are very excited with the ideas and structure we received… all Ambassadors need this… I have been doing it wrong. Thanks.”

This dynamic and interactive event is called Power Up! Leadership Training – Plugging Men into Your Church. “Every year, leaders ask us after the event, ‘Now what do I do?’ By that time, it’s almost too late,” said Chuck Schneider, National Director of Field Ministries for Promise Keepers. “We are excited to have this training available to help pastors and leaders develop a follow-up plan before they take their men to the conference. And I’m glad we have a partner like Man in the Mirror to help.”

“Our goal is to help leaders develop a concrete plan to connect men from the conference to the ongoing discipleship efforts in their church after the Promise Keepers ‘Unleashed’ conference,” said Brett Clemmer, vice president of leadership development at Man in the Mirror, and director of their Leadership Training Center. “Promise Keepers and Man in the Mirror are convinced that getting the men to the conference is only half the battle – these trainings will help leaders create an ongoing discipleship track for their men.”

The “Power Up! Leadership Training” curriculum gives leaders tools for the battle. Sessions during the half-day training include, “Getting Men into Life-long Spiritual Growth,” “Avoiding the Post-event Let Down,” “Pathways from PK to Discipleship” and more. Man in the Mirror is using faculty from their Leadership Training Center program, which has trained over 2,000 leaders from hundreds of churches around the world to build effective disciple-making ministries. In the future, they will recruit additional trainers from the geographic region of each conference, who will then continue to be available locally to help churches execute their plans.

The 2006 men’s ministry training sessions have already been held in 4 cities: Jackson, MS; Dallas, TX; Kansas City, MO; and Colorado Springs, CO. Remaining Power Up! weekends are planned for:

• July 22 - Grand Rapids, MI
• July 29 - Louisville, KY
• August 5 - Spokane, WA
• August 19 - Sacramento, CA
• August 19 - Glendale, AZ
• September 9 - Los Angeles, CA

The trainings are held as part of a weekend of PK activities approximately eight weeks prior to the conference in that city. The weekend consists of a Friday night “Power Up! rally,” the Saturday morning training open to all leaders, and a Saturday afternoon training for “ambassadors,” local volunteers who are helping promote the Promise Keepers “Unleashed” Conference and help with follow-up. The rally is free; there is a fee for the training.
Register for the training today! Get the details on the Power Up! rally coming to a city near you.

Both Promise Keepers and Man in the Mirror are charter members of the National Coalition of Men’s Ministries.

Are you capable of seeing 20 / 20 inside and out?

As a Christian Life and Career coach, I have noted that most people have better outward vision than inner vision. That is, they act as if they can see others qualities better than they can see the qualities of themselves. Everyone of us where wonderfully and fearfully made by God, but so few of us take the time to obtain a 20 / 20 look inside ourselves in order to find out exactly what type of amazing creation we are. The purpose of this article is to get you thinking and acting on ways to see the qualities of your inner self first and others second, so that you can promote your personal growth and development.

If I asked most people what their individual gifts, talents, or capabilities are, very few would be able to quickly respond and give me an answer. Most have to really think about it and then answer. And even then, they are not 100 percent sure that they are right. Isn’t it kind of weird that people are not sure about themselves and can only give their best guess about their God given talents? Now if I ask them to tell me the faults or even good points about their boss or a co-worker, most can do so very quickly. Weird or not, it is reality that people are more observant about others than themselves.

More often than not, even though we think we can see 20 / 20 into others and know their faults and strengths, we are wrong. We are often mistaken, because we do not understand the complexities within our own lives – much less understanding the complexities in someone else’s life. Before we can do understand others, we need to have a 20 / 20 look into ourselves to understand who we are, what our talents are, and what we want to do with our talent in our lives and careers.
Understanding who and what you are will help you to understand that not only are you a unique and special person, but so is everyone else. One of the best ways to see this is to take one of the Myers-Briggs® assessments. “…For more than 50 years, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator® (MBTI®) instrument has been the world's most trusted and widely used assessment for understanding individual differences and discovering new ways to work and interact with others…” The results of this tool will point out an individual's strengths and unique gifts, while also pointing out vulnerabilities and areas for personal development. Within groups, the MBTI is helpful to help recognize and value differences among individuals, so that strengths can be combined and some interpersonal difficulties may be more easily overcome.
In addition to the MBTI®, there is also the FIRO-B® (Fundamental
Interpersonal Relations Orientation–Behavior), Strong® (Strong Interest Survey), and CPI® (California Psychological Inventory) assessment tools which can be used to better understand yourself and others. The FIRO-B, a widely used tool, can help anyone not only understand their own behavior, but the behavior of others around them. And as such, the FIRO-B is an invaluable tool not only for discovering who you are, but for team building, management training, or communication workshops.

The Strong® helps individuals discover their personal interests and chart a plan of action regarding their individual careers. The Strong® presents a clear picture of not only your special interest, but your learning, leadership, and risk-taking styles in relation to the various jobs, work settings, and career fields in today’s world. The Strong Inventory® has special assessments for adults, college students and even high school students. People need to know that, from a young high school student to late adulthood, it is never too early or too late to discover your personal interest and set yourself upon a path that will lead to your ultimate success in life.

The CPI 260™ assessment opens a new dimension into people's strengths and opportunities for personal growth and development, offering an exciting picture of the person as seen through the eyes of others. There are two remarkable CPI assessment reports: The Feedback Report and The Coaching Report For Leaders. The Feedback Report covers five areas: Dealing with Others, Self-Management, Motivations and Thinking Style, Personal Characteristics, and Work-Related Measures. While the Coaching Report For Leaders covers the following five areas: Self-Management, Team Building and Teamwork, Organizational Capabilities, Problem Solving, and Sustaining Your Personal Vision (and the vision of the work place). This is powerful information that can shape what you can do to grow and develop yourself.

So are you ready to see 20 / 20 inside yourself and outside of yourself? Are you ready to act and find out just who you are? Once you know better who you are, you will open yourself up to an assortment of positive things that will promote your personal growth and development. As I said before, the better you can see the qualities of who you are will indicate how well you can see the qualities of others. Being able to see 20 / 20 inside and out will help move you towards ultimate success in all aspects of your life. There is nothing holding you back except you so don’t bury or hide away your individual talents. Improve upon your talents by obtaining a 20 / 20 inner and outer vision now for brighter expectations for your life tomorrow.

If you would like more information, you can go to www.realcoach.org – where you can not only obtain information, but full sample copies (many in color) of various different assessments. Here’s to your ultimate success.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR NEWSLETTER, E-ZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include the following with it: Stan Lewis is a Christian Leadership & Life Coach. If you liked this article, you should really explore coaching to increase your personal growth & development by Clicking Here or the various line of Myers-Briggs©, FIRO-B©, STRONG©, & CPI© assessments at www.realcoach.org. He also has awesome newsletter – to subscribe email him at timetoexplore@aweber.com Questions about this article or you need assistance, please call me at 214-629-7217.

Feeding The Monster

Most of us are familiar with the Ten Commandments. Most of us heard them as children, with some taking many, few, or none of the commandments to heart. Now some of these commandments strike us as serious things that should never be violated. The one that rises to the top of most of our minds is the commandment, "...thou shall not kill..." This is a very serious commandment and one of our highest laws; however, if I had to pick a key commandment from the Ten, thou shall not kill would not be at the top of my list. Rather it would be that little remembered commandment that says that,"...thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s property..." Most people are murdered today because someone else wanted something they had and killed that person to get it. People steal because they want something that someone else has. As a Christian life and leadership coach, I also know that many leaders, allow covetous and envy to intrude upon and hurt their teams.

Covet means to want ardently or to badly want something that someone else has. There are times when a manager or supervisor of a team is not a leader. When meetings or planning sessions are conducted, many of the team members will all turn towards a certain person(s), manager or not. Especially, when an answer to a problem is needed or the team needs direction. Many low to mid level managers will covet what this leader has.

Or let's say that there is an individual who badly wants to branch out into management or a supervisory role, but has not developed their personal talents to become a leader. Many of these people want to get to the top, but do not want to pay the price to do so. When the team or group is looking towards someone else in the group for leadership or management is looking towards someone other than them to lead, they covet the attention the leader is getting.

In any case, people wrongly covet what they desire, but do not have. And to clarify, many of these people have untapped gifts which they have never developed for leadership positions. The choice to not develop or seek development is theirs, but they rarely regard this fact. A covetable attitude is really kindled in this type of person when upper management is recognizing the accomplishments of a true leader. They want what the perceived leader has and they want it now – not latter.




A covetous attitude leads to jealousy. Jealousy is a revengeful emotion that arises from a desire to have what someone else has. Here again, the strong desire to possess something that belongs to somebody else is the spark of destructive behavior. You desire to have what another has and that desire festers, grows, and consumes that person. When it gets to the point where it begins to consume the edges of a person’s sanity is where destructive behavior takes off like wildfire. At this point, people can and will do almost anything to advance themselves and get that which they covet, but do not wish to earn on their own. They become self made monsters fed by bitter emotions.

A gentleman told me a sad story one day. He had worked really hard to develop his talents/skills as a team member and a leader. He told me that he loved what he did. People and upper management looked to him to solve difficult situations and to lead the way. This gentleman also poured into his team members and always sought to acknowledge and lift them up. However, there was one of his team members that were not happy. You see he had been in his position longer than my friend, but he was not getting the recognition that my friend was getting. This coworker's attitude became - why not me? He felt that he was in the position longer and the accolades should be going to him and not my friend, because of seniority. The fact was that this coworker had a lot of potential, but was doing nothing relevant with it. Instead, he fed his monster.

Managers, supervisors, and team members need to understand that the world does not revolve around them. However, it is difficult to do this if these managers, supervisors, or team members who have not or will not develop their own gifts/talents to become a good leader. Even natural leaders must work on their gifts or they risk not growing to become all they can be as a leader. Rather than feeding the monster, I encourage each of you to find, develop, and use your gifts/talents. Effort and hard work may take you longer, but it is far better to earn a position of leadership than to dispose of the bones of your victims in your closet while getting to the top. Remember, there will be those who may covet what you have obtained, do you really want to find your bones hidden in another's closet - who disposed of you on their climb to the top? So stop feeding the monster. Be yourself. Develop your unique skills and talents to be all that you can be. Personal growth and development, along with hard work - will take you farther than the monster ever will.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR NEWSLETTER, E-ZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include the following with it: Stan Lewis is a Christian Leadership & Life Coach. If you liked this article, you should really check out his newly revised site at www.realcoach.org. If you would like a complimentary chat to talk about any issue, goal setting, or problems – Click on "Free Chat". Please take advantage of other FREEBIES by clicking here on Freebies. Questions about this article or you need assistance, please call me at 214-629-7217

Tell Me Something, Just Where Are You At?

By Stan Lewis


There are so many lost people in the world who do not really know where they are in life. There is no mentor, Christian life coach, leadership coach or anyone else to guide them. Of those who are aware of where they are in life, there are multitudes that are not at all happy with their present location in life. That leads me to ask several questions. Are you lost or do you know what your life’s address is? And if you do know your address, is it the address that you want?

If you are feeling lost, I must ask – do you know how valuable you are? You are extremely valuable and it does not matter what the world or anyone else says. It does not alter the “fact” that you are valuable. Lost or not, it is you who determines your personal address. Your present address might read rjones@valueless.org, johnsmith@donotfindme.com or Alicia@hopelesslylost.biz.

You have to first realize that you have value and that you “must” seek out and develop the gifts that make you special. Next, you have to want to be found. Unless you want to be found and rescued, chances are that you will never be found. It is a choice that only you can make, so please make the choice to be found and rescued. After that you have to put forth the effort to be found and rescued. Wilderness survival guides tell us, that if we are lost, to put up or lay out a signal so that others may see it. This way rescuers will know that you are lost. At this point, someone can come to your rescue. The same is true if you are lost in life. You need to let people know, so that they can come to your rescue. So put in the effort and put up or lay out the necessary signals to attract the attention of responsible mentors or Christian life coaches. There are several Christian life coaches who can help you if you are lost among life issues. A good Christian life coach can change your address from rjones@valueless.org to rjones@valuableone.org or from that of johnsmith@donotfindme.com or Alicia@hopelesslylost.biz to that johnsmith@foundandonthemove.com or Alicia@ontrack.biz.

Now to the questions of if you know your address and if this is the address you want to be at. Let us take the first question. Do you know your address or does it presently read pj@idonothaveaclue.org? I teach orienteering to boys and young men. They are able to find there way by using a compass and a map. However, before they start – they must know where they are and where they want to go. The same is true in life and the business world. In order for you to get anywhere, you must know where you are and where it is that you wish to go.

So where are you at? Being at jose@whereami.biz is not a good starting place. So first things first, take some time to sit down and evaluate where you are. Take into account where your passion is, your talents/skills, and your education/training. It is important that you take the following to heart:
Your passion is what motivates you. What you are excited about doing and drives you to do more each time you act upon what you are passionate about.
Your talents and skills are your special gifts which can help you advance and act upon your passion.
Education and training will enhance both your passion and talents/skills.

Once you have an understanding of these things, you will know where you’re at in your life.

Once you know where you are – jose@hereiam.biz - you are ready to tackle the last question – where is it you want to go? First determine what you want to do with your passion in terms of your career and/or your life. Set specific steps you want to take to get where you desire to be. Take these action steps one at a time. As you accomplish each step, it will motivate you to take the next step and the next until you have arrived at your goal.
You will need to determine the best way to apply your talents/skills to assist you in bringing about your goal. Part of your action steps should be how you are going to use your talents/skills to bring about your goal.

You will also need to improve upon your talents/skills through training and/or education. A good mentor or accountability partner that has been along the road that you want to travel can be a big help. Likewise a Christian life coach or leadership coach is also extremely helpful. A good coach, with the skill to guide you, can take you where you are passionate about being. If your passion is positively and correctly feed, then you will increase the probability of finding the happiness and fullness in life that you desire. Your address might then read something like moses@theredseacom, peter@therock.biz or paul@thegreatcommission.org.

By desiring to be found (by a mentor, life coach or leadership coach), by determining where you are and by taking a well planned journey you will likely be quite happy where you will find yourself. You will have answered the questions – am I lost, where is my life’s address, and is this where I want to be? The only thing is to be diligent and consistent in keeping with your action steps and goals. Diligence and consistency along your journey will lead to the right answers which will bring you success. And who knows, your personal address may yet read success@howdoyoulikemenow.com.

Breaking Through The "Status Quo"

By Stan Lewis
slewis@realcoach.org


In order to get to where you are supposed to be in life and have the desires of your heart, you have to get past the Status Quo. Breaking the status quo will involve embracing what I call the F.A.C.T.S. of life. We need to Focus on God's word and the direction that he gives in that word. Then we need to allow this Focus to affect our Attitudes, so that we change our attitudes from the negative to the positive. A positive Attitude will allow us to effectively embrace the necessary Change in our lives, so that we can effectively use our gifts. Change will affect our Thinking as our minds are open to new opportunities around us. These opportunities will enflame our passion to use our gifts. And finally, the way we Think will renew how we See things around us.

I like things the way they are…: Just Stop It!

First, we need to both define and understand the definition of status quo is before we can begin the journey towards any type of break through. The Status Quo is the condition or state of affairs that currently exists within and/or around us. In life, if there is no growth - there will be no life. When there is no growth in one's life, it is called being stagnant. Just like a tree we need to continually grow or slowly die out. As a person, we must grow spiritually, mentally and physically through out our lives or slowly die out ourselves. The taking away any of these three things and growth is limited. Then things around your life take on a Status Quo framework. We get use to this status quo and all of our potential dies out as we either carelessly or purposely live our lives to expire slowly day by day.

It will never work -Stop It

You have heard the phrase - you are what you eat - well the same is true when it comes to focus. Whatever it is that you make the center point of your thoughts is what you are. If that center point is anger, hate, fear, etc. - then that is your focus. If you truly center on the belief that "it'll never work...no matter what I try"- then that is your focus and sadly, you will for fill this false prophecy. If that center point is God's word, then that is your focus. This is an awesome focus and his word will give you direction and purpose. It will work! Put it to the test for 90 days and it will change you.

If everyone else would just… - Please, stop It.

After obtaining a positive and uplifting focus, we need to allow this Focus to affect our Attitudes, so that we change our attitudes from the negative to the positive. Many people say -"...if everyone would just...everything would be alright. "Just stop it, because that is not true. We can only control ourselves, our thoughts, and our actions. We can not control the thoughts and actions of others; therefore is a waste of time to do so. Taking up a positive focus will not only change your attitude about everything, but your interaction with others is more positive and productive. People pick up on others with a positive attitude, because it is has a comforting and uplifting effect upon them. They draw people in like a warm fireplace on a cold winter night.

I don't need to, but everyone else does – Friend, Just Stop It

A positive Attitude will allow us to effectively embrace the necessary Change in our lives, so that we can effectively use our gifts. For most people change is uncomfortable and sometimes it can be down right painful. It is natural to want to avoid what is uncomfortable and what is painful. But growth and development comes with things and situations that are uncomfortable and painful. As a baby, we crawled. When we grew and developed into a toddler, it was not without a few knocks and bruises. Nothing has changed, because you have the potential to grow and develop right up to the day the Lord calls you home. Too often many of us will cry out for others to make changes in their lives and leave them alone to live their “status quo” lifestyle. If that is the way you are thinking, just stop it friend. You have wants and desires that you would love to have, but in order to get them you must change. So discover your gifts, develop them, and make a change for growth and development.

I can't do that – You Can Too, Just Stop It

If you want to be 100% right, just say the following - I can't do it. As long as you say that, you will always be correct, that is until you embrace change. Change will affect our Thinking as our minds are open to new opportunities around us. As our minds open up, new thought processes begin in our minds. Things we would have never imagined start to enter into our heads. These new thoughts produce new opportunities. These opportunities will enflame your passion to use your gifts. Remember, it is far easier to be impassioned about change that comes about from a free flowing river, than a stagnate pool of water.

From where I sit, it's everyone else who has a problem... – Not Really My Friend, So Just Stop It

And finally, the way we Think will renew how we See things around us. Those new and positive things that you would never have imagined are what you should be thinking upon now. Those thought processes over the next 90 days will change how you see yourself and the world around you. It will also change how you solve and handle day to day problems and situations. Do not turn toward the negative style of thinking that says ...from where I sit, it's everyone else who has a problem... Not really my friend, so just stop it. This style of thinking will shut down your personal growth and development. Instead, forget about what problems or negative personality traits of others. Remember, you can not change, grow, or develop them without their permission and willingness. However, you can change yourself. You can give yourself permission to grow and develop yourself.

When ever a negative I can't or blaming thought process starts to come upon you - just stop it then and there. Do not give it an entry way into your mind. Instead, remember to take the F.A.C.T.S approach to life, because when we have a positive focus that gives us an excellent attitude for personal change that enhances our thinking to new levels which enable us to see new opportunities. You can then focus on these new things and thus totally change both who you are today, as well as, who you well grow and develop into tomorrow. If you need help breaking the barriers of the status quo, please let me know. I'd love to help coach you past the barriers and be your accountability partner.